Books are Painful
by xeeyas
Summary: Naruto learns the hard way that books are dangerous.


Meh… I came up with this at Borders…

**Meh… I came up with this at Borders…. Not much. I might make it into a series of one-shots, though. **

**Oh… I don't own Naruto. **

**Flash backs are in italics and third person!**

I stared up at the clock pensively, waiting for detention to end. The teacher made it very clear that he was not babysitting us, and that he detested us in every way possible. I had already counted all of the books that lined the back shelf (210 to be exact). And I was not in the mood to watch the other students. (One kid had strange love of fire and tried to set the lab on fire while another was there because he had 'poor judgment in dealing with a bully'). Yeah, none of them were really my cup of tea.

Before I get ahead of myself let me tell you how I wound up in the land of endless happiness and joy:

It all started at lunch with Sakura and Ino fighting over Sasuke… again. (I mean really! Why him?! They should be fighting over me!) Hinata was just sitting there blushing. Shino was well… he was… he was just being Shino. (Everyone else has a different lunch period) Well anyways the scene played out like this:

"_Oh, shut the hell up, Ino-pig!" Sakura yelled._

"_Why are you jealous, forehead?" Ino smirked as she hugged Sasuke. Sasuke, like always, blatantly ignored them._

"_NO" Sakura was on verge of tackling Ino at this point "Isn't it obvious? I mean, look at his repulsed face! I would be angry too if someone like you was clinging on to me like a lost child!" She had a look of triumph on her face. Sasuke was still ignoring them._

"_Umm… s-shouldn't you argue a little more quietly…?" Hinata mumbled while averted her eyes. Shino gave a quick nod in agreement. Naruto sighed and Sasuke continued to go about his lunch while Ino and Sakura glared menacingly at each other. Other miscellaneous and unimportant students were beginning to watch the fiasco._

"_People are watching. Try not to make scene." Shino stated solemnly._

"_Y-yes please listen to Shino…" Hinata pleaded with her friends. But it was completely useless as Sakura and Ino kept arguing. _

"_Eh, Ignore them… they'll stop any second now!" Naruto said confidently. They eat in silence (with the bickering of Sakura and Ino in the background). Naruto was to busy watching the two argue, while Sasuke and Shino tuned them out. Hinata tried to stop them but eventually gave up._

"_What is with you two? Fighting over the gay emo kid? Sakura you'd be better off with me!" Naruto laughed "All you guys do is squeal over Sasuke. What's so great about him anywa-"_

That was when I turned around, and either Sakura or Ino throw a book at me. I'm guessing it was Sakura because it was a textbook to biology and she's the only one with biology after lunch. But anyways, I just wanted to warn you that I used some very colorful words:

"_Holy f-- shit! What the hell was that?!" Naruto roared at the top of his lungs. Unlucky for him, a teacher had strolled in for a pleasant visit to get her lunch when she heard words as colorful as the rainbow. She turned around and saw Uzumaki Naruto. On the floor. Spurting out foul language like there was no tomorrow. _

"_UZUMAKI NARUTO" bellowed the unhappy no name female teacher "DETENTION!"_

Yeah that basically how I got here… I tried pleading with the teacher, but since I had skipped her class on a daily basis she didn't cut me slack (I think not knowing her name had to do with it a bit).

Know I'm going to waste the rest of my time in detention telling you about the wonderful people here with me:

Takahasi-sensei: He's old and bitter. Often called "The falcon" because he sits and watches the students come in one by one. Merciless when it comes to homework. Hates teaching, but it pays the bills. He's addicted coffee… that can't be healthy.

Ichikawa Kenji-san: Don't really know him. He's part of the video game club and detests sunlight and getting tans. Hates the color orange and has a strange obsession with fire. He can drink a glass of water upside-down and can call you an 'idiotic moron' in seven languages. He was a strange twitch, too. He also wears summer clothes in winter and winter clothes in summer.

Matsura Taro-san: He's the star of track team. Easy-going and gets along with most people. A group of younger students were bullying him. Apparently they ignored them until a teacher found out… They spent two lunch periods together in mediation with the principal. I don't know what happened to the other kids though. He wears green a lot and keeps a chair in his locker…

Finally detention is over! Well gotta go! Hopefully no one stole bike…

**How was it? Good? Bad? Dreadful? TELL ME! Flames welcomed with a smile!**

**Depending on the response I might make it a series of one-shots. Sorry for any errors.. it's pretty late… so yeah…**

**My friend was actually given detention for poor judgment in dealing a bully. He called them Children of Corn. That's it! Strange, right?**

**REVIEW (please)**


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